Monday, 9 April 2012

Funny Hindi SMS



Very Funny SMS Shayari













Pani me gira rumal to rumal gila He

Aasman me dekha to aasman bhi nila He

Muhabat to sab karte hai par

Mai karu to sala character dhila hai …









Funny Shayari on Love in Hindi









Kisi shayar ne kaha zindagi ek lamba safar hai,

Kisi aashiq ne kaha zindagi ek mushkil paheli hai,

Arre dosto zindagi ka arth toh sirf voh bata sakta hai,

Jiski shaadi ke baad bhi koi saheli hai!!!









Funny SMS in Hindi for Friends









Pyar me mout se darta kon hai

Pyar ho jata hai karta kon hai

Hum to kar de pyar me jaan bhi kurban

Par pata to chale ki humse pyar karta kon hai ..?









Funny Hindi SMS on Marriage







Zindagi me Shadi karna bahut zaroori hai..

Kyon ki..?

Zindagi mein Khushiyaan hee sab kuch nahi hoti..









Koi bhi mushkil isse badi nahi…









Hamesha apani lover ka photo purse mai rakhana.

Jab bhi tum mushkil me hoge wo photo dekhana.

Tume lagega ke koi bhi mushkil isse badi nahi… :)









Funny SMS Shayari on Love









Dil ka dard dil todne waley kya janey,

Pyar ke rivajon ko zamane kya janey,

Hoti kitni takleef ladki patane main,

Ye ghar pe baitha ladki ka baap kiya janey. ..









Funny Hindi SMS









Har rat hum tumhe yaad karte kiya hai,

sitaro me tumhe dekha karte hai,

lekin hamare khwabo me mat aana tum

kyuki hum bhoot se dara karte hai…











Funny Hindi SMS











Koi aankhon se baat kar leta hai,

Koi aankhon mein mulaqat kar leta hai,

Bara mushkil hota hai jawab dena,

Jab koi english mein baat kar leta hai…









Na neend aati hai na khaab…







Neend aati hai to khaab aata hai

khaab mein ek ladki aati hai,

ladki ke piche uska baap aata hai

phir na neend aati hai na khaab aata hai…









Fully Faltu SMS in Hindi









Namaskar! Yeh hamari faltu SMS sewa he.

Isme hum logo ko waqt bewaqt pareshan kiya karte hein.

Is sewa ka labh uthane ke liye shukriya.

Ab aap apna kaam kariye….









Funny Hindi Love SMS









Baarish ka mausam bada tadpata hai,

Woh aajaye mehfil mein yeh dil chahta hai,

Par wo aayenge kaise,

Unke paas na raincoat hai na chata hai!!









Teasing SMS for Girlfriend







Ek aap ho ki sharmate bahut ho,

Ek aap ho ki itrate bhi bahut ho,

Dil to karta hai ki aapko dinner pe ley javein,

Lekin kya kare kambakht ki app khaate bhi bahut ho…









Funny SMS for Friends in Hindi









Dosti ek sagar hai aur dost machhaliya hai,

Mai tume mere dil mai sambhalkar rakhunga,

Par agar tumne dur jane ki koshish ki To,

khuda kasam pani se nikal kar billi ko de dunga…









Sad Love SMS in Hindi









Hamne bhi kabhi pyaar kiya tha,

Thoda nahi beshumar kiya tha,

Badal gayi jindagi tab,

Jab usne kaha arey pagal maine to mazak kiya tha…















Funny Friendship SMS in Hindi













Aansun Tera Gire To Ankhen Mere Ho,

Dil Tera Dhadke To Dhadkan Meri Ho,

Bhagwan Kare Humari Dosti Itni Gahre Ho Ki

Naukari Tum Karo Aur Salary Meri Ho!









Funny Hindi SMS 140 Character







Na ishq karna mere yaar

ye ladkiya bahut satati hai

na karna in par aitbar

ye kharch bahut karwati hai

recharge tum karwa ke dete ho

or number mera lagati hai…









140 Character Funny Hindi SMS











Humne msg bhej ke jab-jab apko yad kiya

aapne us sms ka na kabhi jawaab diya

waise to sunday ko over time lagaane ki aadat nahi

chalo fir bhi ye sunday apke naam kurbaan kiya…









Funny Love Quotes in Hindi





Bekar hai wo log jo apne lover ko miss kiya karte hai

Arre miss karna hai to machharo ko karo

Jo apni jaan per khel kar apko kiss kiya karte hai…









Very Funny Hindi Friendship SMS









Bahut udaas hai koi tere jaane se

Ho sake to lout aa kisi bahane se

Tu lakh khafa sahi par ek baar to dekh

Kitna kachra jama hai tere na aane se… :)









Insulting SMS in Hindi









Agar manzil ko pana hai to honsla sath rakhna

Agar pyaar ko pana hai to etbaar sath rakhna

Agar hamesha muskurana hai to daant saaf rakhna…:D









Funny Engagement SMS in Hindi









Zindagi me Shadi karna bahut zaroori hai..

Kyon ki..?

Zindagi mein Khushiyaan hee sab kuch nahi hoti..







Funny Broken Heart SMS in Hindi







Payal chhankati ayee thi…..

Payal chhankati chali gayee,

Main sindoor leke khada tha,

Mujhe Rakhi pehnake chali gayee…









Funny Shayari SMS on Exams in Hindi







Har taraf padhai ka saya hai

peparon mein number kisne paya hai

ham to u hin aye the paper dene

sab kehte hain sala poora padh kar aya hai…









Funny Exam SMS in Hindi for Friends









Har Sawal Se Dat Kar Ladna,

Fekne Me Kami Mat Karna,

Mouka Mila To Peche Bhi Dekhna,

Aur Ek Baath Yaad Rakhna,

Aage Wala Ka Paper Apna Samajhna…









Today is Nag Panchami…







A couple had a fight whole night…

Later Next morning, Husband offered a glass of milk to his wife.

Wife – You are sorry for fighting with me?

Husband – No… Today is Nag Panchami,

Le Nagin Pee Le….









160 Character Funny Hindi SMS







Question : Why do girls close

their eyes while kissing a guy?

Guess…

Guess

.

.

.

Answer : Yeh ladkiyan ladkon

ko kabhi khush nahi dekh sakti.









140 character Hindi SMS Jokes









Tumhari Saalgirah Pe Jaana Kia Bhejoon

Apni Jaan Bhejoon Keh Apna Dil Bhejoon

Phir Soochta Hoon Jaana Kion Na

Tumhare Liye Kee Hui Shopping Ka Bill Bhejoon









Funny Propose Day SMS in Hindi





Ek Dum Latest And Jhakaas Way 2 Propose..



Boy:

Xcuse Me



Girl:

Jee Kahiye



Boy:

Mere Hone Wale Bacho Ki Taraf Se

Apko Happy Mother’s DAY….





Funny Friendship SMS in Hindi







Love Is Like A Pant

But Friendship

Is Like A Chaddi

Bcoz

Pant Phat Bhi Jaye To

Chaddi Izzat Bacha Leti Hai

So Thanx 4 Being My

Chaddi Friend…









Funny Hindi SMS Messages







Woh zindagi hi kya jisme mohabbat nahi,

Woh mohabat hi kya jisme yaadein nahi,

Woh yaadein hi kya jisme tum nahi,

Aur woh tum hi kya jiske saath hum nahi….

`

Suna hai wo keh kar gaye hai ke ab to hum,

Sirf tumhare khawboo main hi aayenge,

Koi keh de unse ki wo vada kar le hum,

Jindgi bher ke liye so jayenge.

`

Badi muddat se chaha hai tumhe

Badi duaaon se paya hai tumhe

Thuje bhulane ka sochu bhi kaise,

Kismat ki lakiroon se churaya hai tumhe..

`

Tera naam bhi usme zarur aayega,

Agar ye padkar bhi tune reply nahi kiya,

To pehla prize bhi tujhe mil jaayega

`

Darr-darr bhatkate hain armaan ki tarha,

Har koi humse milta hai anjaan ki tarha,

In dosto se call ki kya aas karen,

Ye to SMS bhi karte hain ehsaan ki tarha

`

Qayamat tak tujhe yaad karenge,

Teri har baat par aitbaar karenge,

Tujhe SMS karne ko to nahi kahenge,

Par phir bhi tere SMS ka intezar karenge…

`

Bolaa dukaan-daar, ke kyaa chahiye tumhain

Jo bhii kaho ge merii dukaan per wo paoge

maine kahaa ke kutte ke khaane kaa cake hai

bolaa yahiin pe khaaoge yaa leke jaaoge!!!!:?









Funny SMS Jokes in Hindi







Hum woh nahi jo tum ko ghum main chhod de,

hum woh nahi joh tumse nata tod de,

hum woh hain ki agar teri saanse

ruk jae to tuj se apni sanse joor de.

`

Zindagi jaise ek saza si ho gayi hai,

gamm ke saagar me is kadar kho gayi hai,

tum kar do ek SMS yeh guzarish hai meri,

tumari SMS ki adat si ho gayi hai.

`

Sms na karke dil tod diya, mobile dafna dena,

Kafan na mile to apna rumaal udaa dena.

Koi puche rog kya tha to nazre jhuka kar tu kanjusi bata dena..

`

Hum hum hain, tum tum ho

Na hum kam hain

Na tum kam ho

To kis bat ka gam hai

SMS bhejte raho,

Tabhi tu lage ga k mobile wale mein dam hai.

`

Dinse raat hone ko aaai hai

Pata nahin ye kaisi judai hai

Parwah nahin karte wo apne dost ki

Na jane ye kaisi dosti nibhai hai..

`

Eid ka chand mushkil se dikhta hai.

Lailla ko majnu mushkil se milta hai.

Hum to sms bhejte rehte hai par

Aajkal aapka sms mushkill se milta hai…

`

Chahane se har baat nahi hoti,

Thode se andhere se raat nahi hoti…..

Jinhe hum jaan se jyada chahte hai,

Unse har roz mulakat nahi hoti…..

`

Durr kahin wadi main rahta hai woh!

Har lamha khayal main rahta hai woh!

Kaisa hai woh kis haal main hai woh!

Dil ka har sawal main rahta hai woh!

`

Duniya mein koi kisi ke liye kuch nahi karta

Marne wale ke saath har koi nahi marta

Arey… Marne ki baat to door rahi

Yahan to zindgi hai phir bhi koi yaad nahi kar..

`

Lamhe judai ke bekarar kerte hain,

Haalat mere mujhe laachar karte hain,

Aankhe meri pad lo kabhi,

Ham khud kaise kahe ki aapse pyaar karte hain.









Funny SMS Jokes in Hindi







Jaam pe jaam peene se kya fayeda,

Raat guzri to utar jayegi,

Kisi ki aankhon se peeyo khuda ki kasam,

Umr saari nashe mein guzar jayegi.

`

Log kehte hain ke ishq itna mat karo,

Ke husn sar pe sawar ho jaaye,

Hum kehte hain ke ishq itna karo,

Ke patthar dil ko bhi tumse pyaar ho jaye……

`

Har dil ki dhadkan main koi baat hoti hai,

Har udas zindagi main kisi ki yaad hoti hai,

Tume pata ho ya na ho tumhari,

Har khushi ke piche humari duaa hoti hai

`

Dil ne tera pyar per majbur mujh ko kardiya

Is jaha ki har khushi se dur mujh ko kardiya

Jis qadar chaha tha dil ne pass tere aane ko

Is qadar dunya ne tujh ko mujh se dur kardiya.

`

Jab hamko unse mohabbat thi

Unhe hamari mohabbat pe shak tha

Jab unhe ehsas hua hamari mohabbat ka

Tab hum par kisi aur ka hak tha…









Some Funny SMS in Hindi







Royengi ye aankhein muskuraane ke baad,

Aayegi raat din dhal jaane ke baad,

Tum kabhi naa ruthnaa mujhse ae yaar,

Shayad ye zindagi hi na ruth jaaye,

Tumhare ruth jaane ke baad.

`

Train mai aik husband apni wife say:

tujh say shadi ker k pachta raha hun

dil kerta hai tujhey kuttay k agay dal dun

samnay wala passenger:wao wao wao wao!!!

`

Child:papa aunty ka pait kion phola hai?

Father:tujhey sub pata hai!

Child: nahin pata promise!

Father: in k pait main pani bhara hay

CHILD:Oh No! Bacha to doob jaye ga!

`

Girl to boy: Tum larkay kisi larki mei

sub se pehlay kia daikhte ho ?

Boy: Yeh tou depend karta hai k

larki aa rahi hay ya ja rahi hai …:p

`

Zindagi K Raaz…

Raaz Rehney DijiyeJo B Ho Aitraz…

Aitraz Rehney Dejiye

Per Jab B Ye Dil Chahey Aap Se Milna

Plz Ye Mat Khena K Aaj Rehney Dijiye

`

Kal Rat Meri Ankh se 1 Ansu nikal aya

Mai ne usse pucha Tu bahar Q aya?

To usne batya

Koi Teri Ankhon me itna he smaya K me chah kr b apni Jaga na bna paya…

`

Haqiqat jaan lo bichad jane se pahle,

Meri sunlo apni sunane se pahle,

Ye sochlena bhulane se pahle,

Bahut royi hai ye aankhe muskurane se pahle

`

Dil k dard ko zuba par laate nahi,

hum apni aankhon se ansu bahate nahi,

Zakhm chahe kitne hi gahre kyo na ho,

hum DETTOL k siva kuch laagate nahi.

`

Nakaam si koshish kiya karte hai,

Hum hai ke unse pyar kiya karte hai.

Khuda ne taqdeer mein 1 tuta taara nahi likha,

Aur ek hum hai ke chand ki aarzu kiya karte hai!

`

Muskurane ki vajah kya jane hum

Hum to unki yaad ko tazaa karte hai.

Kambakth ye hasi bhi aisi hai ki

Unki judai mein bhi ro kar muskurati hai…









Funny Hindi SMS for Friends









Dekha tujhe to rooh khush ho gayi,

Ek kami thi vo bhi puri ho gayi,

Pagal hain vo log jo kehte hain ki,

Chimpanzi ki aakhri nasal kahin kho gayi!!

`

Shaam hote hi ye Dil udaas hota hai

Toote khwaboo ke siwa kuch na pass hota hai

Tumahri yaad aise waqt bohat aati hai

Bandar jab koi aas-paas hota hai..

`

Ek ladki thi diwani si, sunder si lambi si,

Nazrein jhukake sharmake galion se guzra karti thi

latak matak chalti thi, aur kaha karti thi,

Bartan Lelo Bartan…

`

Hai tu agar mera dilbar,

Hai tu agar mera dilbar,

To aaj ke lunch ka bill tu bhar

`

Khush rahe tu sada yeh dua hai meri

Teri premika hi ban jaaye bhabhi teri..









Naughty SMS in Hindi









I saw a Dream last night

Only You and Me…

You know what happened ??



You were looking so Innocent..

Coz I was eating Maggi

And you were saying:



“Ek Chammach Khila De Naa… Plzzz”





Husband and Wife Jokes in Hindi









Husband to Wife: Tum meri Zindagi ho,

Aur…



Wife: Aur Kya?



Aur…



Tell me aur kya?

Wife shouted: Tell me aur kya?



Husband: Aur Laanat hai aisi zindagi par :(









Exam Jokes SMS in Hindi









Baap:

Itne kum marks..??

2 thappar lagane chahiyen.!!



Beta: Han papa!

maine to us kaminey master

ka ghar bhi dekh liya hai…!!









Happy Unmarried Life

It is well known saying that “Jo Hase, Unke Ghar Base”

But the question is “Ghar Basne K Baad Kitne Hase ?”

So enjoy Happy Unmarried Life









Insulting SMS in Hindi









Vodafone walon ka KUTTA

Aaj subah he chal bsa,



Ab wo Monkey se Add krwaana chahte hain.



Tujhe

Meri

Dosti

ki

Kasam,



Kahin Chhup Ja ;o)









Funny Hindi SMS for Friends

Kabhi yaad aaye

To phone kar lena,



Paise kam ho

to Sms kar lena,



Agar ye bhi na kar sake to



Mobile dahi mein Daal kar

Vibration on kar lena…



Aur



Lassi Pee Lena :)









Funny Exam SMS in Hindi









Uski Nazar Meri Taraf Thi

Meri Nazr Uski Tarf Thi



Vo Mugh Se Kuch Kehna Chahti Thi

Main Us Se Kuch Puchna Chahta Tha



Dono Ise Uljan Mein Bethe Rahe

Aur Exam Over Ho Gaya…









Funny SMS in Hindi









Kya yaar tum bi ajeeb ho,

mere dil ke kitne kareeb ho,

na milte ho na sms karte ho,

kya tum mujse bi jyada garib ho???????



Girl: if u will try 2 kiss me, main shor macha dungi.

Boy:Lekin yaha to dur tak koi nahi hai.

Girl: i know but formality to karni hi padegi..



DUNIA me reh ke sapno me kho jao,

KISIKO apna banalo YA kisi ke ho jao,

AGAR kuch bhi nahi hota to DON’T WORRY,

chaddar-takiya lo aur so jao.



Log kehte hai k khuda ne aapko badi fursat mein banaya hai….

“simple c baat hai, faltu kaam fursat mein hi to kiye jate hain”.



1st Child: Mere Papa Bahut Darpok Hain.

2nd Child: Why?

1st Child: Jab Bhi Road Cross Karte Hain,

Meri Ungli Pakad Lete Hain aur kehte chhodna mat.





Naughty SMS in Hindi











Catch her by her waist…

Bring her home..

Keep ur hand on her neck

Put ur lips on her lips

& have a …

…nice drink…PEPSI

Luv You Oye Bubbly!!









Funny SMS Messages in Hindi









Paani mein whiskey milao ta nasha chadta hai. Paani mein Rum milao to nasha chadta hai. Paani mein brandy milao to nasha chadta hai. Saala paani mein hi kuch gadbad hai….

`

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho… Kuch nahi yaar bas aapki shakal yaad aa gayi!

`

Munna bhai: Agar bina danto ka kutta kate to kya karna chahiye…???

Circuit: simple bhai… Bina sui ka injection lene ka..!!!

`

Ek ladka ek ladki k saath baitha tha. 2nd day doosri ladki k saath deha gaya. 3rd day koi aur ladki thi. 4th day kisi nayi ladki ke saath tha

Moral: Ladkiyan badal jaati hain, ladke nahin badaltey…

`

Which are the 2 latest versions of java.

Think… think… think…

Marjava & Mitjava

`

Tum haste raho, nachte raho, muskurate raho, sada khil khilate raho, khush raho aur gungunate raho, mera kya hai, log tumhe hi pagal samzhenge..

`

Pyar to humein bhi karna tha, par kuch khaas nahi hua. Tajmahal to humein bhi banana tha..

par afsoos ke….

loan pass nahi hua…









Funny Karwa Chauth SMS in Hindi









“Na jane kyu rhe rhe ke ek baat hume bahut satati hai,

karwa chauth karti hai tumhari bibi umar humari kyu bad jati hai.”









Teasing SMS in Hindi









Arz kiya hai!!!…Itne kamjor hue teri judai se…

Gaur farmaiye…Itne kamjor hue teri judai se…

Ki chinti bhi ab kheech le jaati hai charpai se….

`

Ek kutiya ne pillon ko janam diya.

pillon ne pucha maa papa kahan hain?

kutiya boli ” chup raho kameeno papa message padh rahe hain”

`

Sorry aaplogo ko disturb kiya

lekin urgent kaam tha ,

kya kui apni 1 photo abhi bejh sakte hai.

hum log tash khel raha hai aur joker ka patta kho gaya hai..

`

Dheere dheere apna bana gaya koi…

Humein piyar ke sapne dikha gaya koi…

Kya yeh sach much piyaar hai ya rab…

Ya phir chuuna laga gaya koi…

`

Mandir mein jaap karta hoon,

Masjid mein adaab karta hoon,

Insaan se kahin bhagwan na ban jaun

isliye roz tujhko SMS karke paap karta hoon.









Funny Hindi Friendship SMS









Difference between Best Friend & Just Friend:

When U r in hospital

Just Friend asks:

Tabiyat kaisi hai?

Best Friend asks:

Nurse kaisi hai?

`

Friendship Means:

U happy, I happy

U sad, I sad

U cry, I cry

U laugh, I laugh

U fell down in mud

I Dance Dhinchak Dhinchak..!











Funny Dussehra SMS









RAWAN ke 10 Sar,

20 Aankhein,

Par Nazar Ek hi ladki par,



Aapka Sar 1,

Aakhein 2,

Par Nazar har ladki par.



Ab batao ki…….?



Asli Rawan kaun :-D



Wish You HAPPY DASARA!









Funny AIDS Day SMS







I am sorry yaar,

Aaj tak maine tujhe avoid kiya,

Kai bar tujhse bat nahi ki,

Tujhse hath nahi milaya,

Sorry yaar mujhe pata nahi tha ki

“AIDS” chhune se nahi failta…















Hindi Exam SMS











Har Sawal Se Dat Kar Ladna,

Fekne Me Kami Mat Karna,

Mouka Mila To Peche Bhi Dekhna,

Aur Ek Baath Yaad Rakhna,

Aage Wala Ka Paper Apna Samajhna…

`

Students k Dard ko University Kya Jane

College K Riwajon ko Parents Kya Jane

Hoti hai Kitni Taqlif 1 Paper Likhne Main

Wo Paper Check Karne Wala Kya Jane….

`

Exams ke 4 din pehle syllabus dekha to yaad aaya,

Kuch To Hua Hai Kuch Ho Gaya Hai,

Exams ke din paper dekh kar yaad aaya,

Sab Kuch Alag Hai Sab Kuch Naya Hai..

`



`

Ye exam ke rishte bhi ajib hote hai,

sab apne apne naseeb hote hai,

rahte hai nigahon se dur,

sale wahi question paper me compulsory hote hai…









Funny Exam Shayari in Hindi









Kaash koi exam ke rijalt ka insurance kara dete,

To har exam ke pehle premium bhar dete,

Paas hote to thik varna insurance claim to kar hi dete.

`

Lamha Lamha Waqt Guzar Jayega,

Chand Lamhon Mein Exams Aa Jayega,

Abhi Bhi Waqt Hai Do Line Padh Lo,

Warna Pass Kya MUNNA BHAI Karwayega?

`

Exams ke 4 din pehle syllabus dekha to yaad aaya,

Kuch To Hua Hai Kuch Ho Gaya Hai,

Exams ke din paper dekh kar yaad aaya,

Sab Kuch Alag Hai Sab Kuch Naya Hai?

`

Na waqt itna k sallybus pura kiya jaye,

Na tarkeeb koi k exam pass kiya jaye,

Na jane kaun sa dard diya hai is parhai ne…

Na roya jaye aur na soya jaye .

`

3 sardar after exam 1st:Yaar mujhey kuch nahi ata tha main paper khali chor aya hu.

2nd: Mai bhi!

3rd:Shit yaar, teacher samjhegi hum ne cheating ki hai.

`

Hum jeete EK bar hai, Marte EK bar hai, Pyar EK bar hota hai,

Aur shaadi bhi EK hi bar hoti hai..

tO ye EXAMS BAR-BAR KYUN ???









Funny Shayari SMS







Dil ke dard ko dil torne wale kya jana,

Pyar ki rasmo ke yeh zamane wale kya jane,

Hoti hai kitni takliff kabar ke niche,

Yeh upar se phool charane wale kya jane

`

Ramlila se Hanuman tha farar,

Roll ke liye fit kiya 1 sardar,

sardar tha bahut hi kamaal,

ped se chalang mar ke bola,

“Jo bole so nihal”

Sita DARLING sasriyakal….

`

Ladki: Bhaiya 12 kele dedo

Fruit Wala: Ye lo behen.

Ladki: Yeh to naram hai thode kadak de do

Fruit Wala: kya madam kabhi to khane k liye liya karo..!!!

`

Jahan ki gurbat me sukun nahi ayega,

Gam-e-tohin se kubul nahi ayega.

Maklul ki fitrat he ye kafir,

Dimag fatt jayega parr yeh sher samaj nahi ayega..!!

`

Baba ranchoddas said

Neend k piche mat bhago,

Agar bhagna hai to padhai k piche bago,

Neend jhak mar k piche ayegi.

All IS WELL

`

10th class ka student : Mein fail hona chahta hu

Dost : Kyun?

Student : Papa ne kaha hai ki 1st aaya,

to science dilvaunga, 2nd aaya to arts,

fair hua to shadi kara denge!

`

itni lambi padthe padhte dam nikal jaaye!!!

Aasmaan aaj phir se roya hai,

Naakaam Aashiqon ke haar mein ek aur moti piroya hai,

Koi to bataaye kahan mera mehboob khoya hai,

mohabbat ki kabr mein mera yeh pyaar soya hai.

`

har ilzaam ke hakdaar wo hame bana jate hain,

har khata ki saza,wo hamen suna jate hain,

hum har baar khamos rah jate hain,

kyonki wo har baar apna hone ka haq jata jate hain.

`

Ek aadmi apne aap me kehta hu ja raha tha ki aisi zindagi se toh maut aachi.

Achanak Yamdoot aa gaya aur bola “Tumhari jaan lene ka hukm hai”

Aadmi : Lo batao, aab insaan mazaak bhi nahi kar sakta hai kya?









Insult SMS in Hindi









Congrats, U have been awarded

An M.B.A degree

For not Smsing me.

MBA means ‘Member of Bhikari Association’

Kindly forward it to all M.B.A’s.

`

Rose is Lal

Sky is Nila,

Ur brain is like Khali Patila.

Bura maan liya?

O.K

Rose is red

Sky is blue,

I born smart

What d hell happened to u?

Thora sa or bura maan lo!

`

Taste this SMS

Did u feel the taste of ginger?

No?

Sure?

Well…..

Bandar kya jaane adrak ka swaad!!

`

Kamaal tere nakhrey,

Kamaal tera style hai,

Baat karne ki tameez nahin

Aur haath mein mobile hai?

`

Mosam shabab ka

Nasha sharab ka

Parda janab ka

Aur rang gulab ka

In main sabse haseen to dekho

SMS parhne wala “Mendak talab ka”









Exam SMS Jokes in Hindi









Exams ke do din pehle syllabus dekha to yaad aaya,

Kuch To Hua Hai Kuch Ho Gaya Hai,

Exams ke din paper dekh kar yaad aaya,

Sab Kuch Alag Hai Sab Kuch Naya Hai!

`

Lamha Lamha waqt guzar jayega…

Chund lamhon mein exam aa jayega…

Abhi bhi waqt hai, do line parh lo…

Warna pass kya Munna Bhai karvaye ga?

All the best!

`

Kash koi exam result ka insurance kara deta,

To har exam ka pehle premium bharwa deta,

Pass hote to thik hai,

Varna insurance claim karva leta…

All the best!









Dil ka dard…





dil ka dard dil thodnewala kya jaane

pyaar ke rizvon ko zamana kya jaane

hoti hai kitni takleef ladki patane mein

ye ghar pe baitha ladki ka baap kya jaane…









Funny Hindi SMS Shayari









Arz kiya hai:

Bahaar aane se pehle fiza aa gayi,

ki bahaar aane se pehle fize aa gayi,

Aur phool khilne se pehle…..

…. bakri kha gayi















Pyaar kaa anzaam…





Humne bhi pyaar kiyaa hai zindgi me badi josh ke saath,

Humne bhi pyaar kiyaa hai zindgi me badi hosh ke saath,

lekin ab hum pyaar karenge badeeeeeeee sochhh ke saath,

Kyunki kal shaam usko dekhaa kisi aur ke saaath…









Deadly Shayari.! read at your own risk…





Super Deadly Pakau Shayaris!!!





1.

Tumse pyaar karte karte hamne kar diya crime….

Tumse pyaar karte karte hamne kar diya crime….

.

.

.

.

1 is neither composite nor prime”



2.

Agar dava chahiyetoh dhundo koi chemist….

Agar dava chahiyetoh dhundo koi chemist….

.

.

.

.

.

My NAME IS KHAN and I AM NOT A TERRORIST…



3.

Yuh khamosh rehkar tadpogi kabtak….

yuh khamosh rehkar tadpogi kabtak….

.

.

.

.

Cameraman praful ke saath deepak chaurasia AAJ TAK..



4.

Arz kiya hai..



He is KISSING

She is KISSING



He is KISSING

She is KISSING

.

.

.

.

* * *Some text missing

* * *some text missing



5.

Woh mujhe chod ke chali gayi usse pana mein chahun….

woh mujhe chod ke chali gayi usse pana mein chahun….

.

.

.

.

ahun ahun ahun

ahun ahun ahun



6.

Mehngai ki iss daur mein karna padta hai apne kharche par kabooo..

mehnngai ki iss daur mein karna padta hai apne kharche par kabooo..

.

.

.

.

Ek chutki sindoor ki kimat tum kya jano Ramesh babu…



7.

Akbar ne kharide 3-3 ghode..

Akbar ne kharide 3-3 ghode..

.

.

.

.

aja aja dil nichode ….

raat ki matki phode…



8.

Mein hoon yahan tu hai wahan…

Mein hoon yahan tu hai wahan..

.

.

.

.

LIFEBOUY hai jahan tandurusti hai wahan…



9.

Blood donate karne se pehle hamesha uska group janchna…

Blood donate karne se pehle hamesha uska group janchna…

.

.

.

.

BASANTI in kuton ke samne mat nachna….”



10.

Ratan Tata ne establish kiya TATA..

Ratan Tata ne establish kiya TATA..

.

.

.

.



“itni sakti hamen dena data ”



11.

Arz kiya hai…

Ab toh Zindagi ka maksad hai tujhe apnana…

Ab toh Zindagi ka maksad hai tujhe apnana…

.

.

.

.

A for Apple B for Banana…

WAH WAH…!!



12.

Arz kiya hai…

Kal tak thee jo meri present…

Kal tak thee jo meri present…

.

.

.

.

Aaj ho gayee hai past…

.

.

.

.

Kal tak thee jo meri present…

Aaj ho gayee hai past…

.

.

.

.

Offer valid till stocks last.. :-P



13.

Arz kiya hai…

Bakre ne maara jo bakri ko seeng……

Bakre ne maara jo bakri ko seeng……

.

.

.

.

Toh Bakri bhi maregi bakre ko seeng.



14. Arz kiya hai…

Baith kar girlfriend ki Zulfon ke saaye mai aisa josh aaya…

Wah-Wah, Wah-Wah…

Baith kar girlfriend ki Zulfon ke saaye mai aisa josh aaya…

.

.

.

.

Ki Uske papa ne dekh liya aur ICU mai hosh aaya…



15.

Yashomati Maiyya Se Bole Nandlala …

.

.

.

.

Waah! Waah!

.

.

Yashomati Maiyya Se Bole Nandlala …

.

.

.

.

“Maa, Tata Sky Laga Daala To Life Jhingalala ..!!”



16.

Teacher to student : 1 chiku ke ped pe 10 kele lage hai, usme se 5 aam gir gaye , to btao ab kitne angoor bache…

Raju : Sir 10 hathi bache…

Teacher: Arrey waah, tumhe kaise pata chala

Raju : Kyunki aaj main tiffin mein methi ke pronthe laaya hun..



17.

Romio ne juliet se kaha ek sach

.

.

.

.

Romio ne juliet se kaha ek sach

.

.

.

.



Asali masale sach sach MDH…..MDH …!



18.

Ek Kana Ladka Kisi ladki ko Propose kare to kaun sa gana Gayega???????



???????????????



!!!

!!!

….

!!!

….



Ek Nazar se bhi Pyar Hota hai Maine suna Hai……………………………………..



19.

A scientist disconnected his doorbell…….



Can u guess why???



????

try



think!!!



donno???

cuz

.

.

.

.

!!!!!!!!



He wanted to win the No-bell prize!!!!!!!!!! :P



20.



Salma ke pyaar me doob gaya Peter



Gaur farmaiye



Salma ke pyaar me doob gaya Peter

.

.

.

.

.

.

.



Ab hero Honda splendor 80 kilometer prati leter



21.



1 ladki ne kiya ladke ko gaal pe kiss

1 ladki ne kiya ladke ko gaal pe kiss

.

.

.

.

Mutual funds are subjected to market risks……!!!!

Wah wah wah



22.



World’s most PAINFUL shayari…



Dil mai chubhi sui….



Arz kiya hai…



Dil mai chubhi sui…

.

.

.

.

Aawaj aayi

Uui uui, uui uui…









Hasna zindagi ki alamat hai…









Tu mere dil mein aise samaayi hai

Jaise baajre ke khet mein bhains ghus aayi hai

`

Teri zulfein hain ya ghana andhera

Katwa de baal, aur kar de savera

`

Juice peene ka maza cup mein nahin, glass mein hota hai

Greeting card dene ka maza gharwali ko nahin, saali ko hota hai

`

Wo ladai hi kya jis mein do chaar gaaliyan na ho

Aur woh sasuraal hi kya jahan koi saaliyan na ho

`

Majnu Laila ke baal pakad ke bola

Moya kitne din se sar nahin dhoya

`

Jaayiye aap kahan jaayenge

Hum khud aapko chhod aayenge…









4 my swt n w0rld best lvng frndx…





4 my swt n w0rld best lvng frndx…

Frndshp isnt abt ”em s0ry”

Itx abt ” kamine teri galti hy”…

Frndshp isnt abt “em here 4 u”

Itx abt “kahan hy nalayak”…

Frndshp isnt abt “i can undrstnd”

Itx abt “sub teri waja se hua hy saale”…

Frndshp isnt abt “em hpy 4 ur success”

Itx abt “chal beta parhne de”…

Frndshp isnt abt “i care 4 u”

Itx abt “kamin0 mujhe ch0r k kahan ja0ge”……!!!

Frndx 4evr.. 2gthr 4vr..









Funny Hindi SMS Collections









Shadi Main Larki Ko Itna Kyon Sajaya Jata Hai? Any Guess? . . . . OK I’ll Tell You… MAAL Jaisa Bhi Ho. Packing Achi Honi Chahiye. :-)

`

GREAT INDIANS: When Power Goes Off in US, They call Power House. In China, They Check Fuse . But in India, First thing is To check Neighbor’s House. “Sabki Gayi Hai Na?” Buss!

`

Maine kaha “Dil Ruba” Usne kaha balance bhijwa Maine kaha “Paise Nahi” Usne kaha “Kaise nahi” Maine kaha “Mehangai Hai” Usne kaha “Ja aaj se tu mera bhai hai..

`

Believe in God! Pray 2 god always n everytime…

– - – - – Pray – - – - – Pray – - – - – Pray – - – - -



I SAID PRAY!

NOT press-press!

Bandar ko mobile diya to aisa hi karega

`

Can u think k 2+5=11 kaise aye? Socho-Socho Nahi maluum? Thoda aur dimag lagao Abhi bhi nahi? OK let me tell u k kaise aye Are buddhu itna bhi nahi jante.. GALTI SE

`









Kuch Hum farmaye?





Some Dumb Shayaris!!!



Dibbe pe dibbe, dibbe pe dibbe

Dibbe pe dibbe, dibbe pe dibbe

DIBBE pe dibbe, DIBBE PE dibbe

Are wah, kya balance!



Aaj aasmaan mein taare aise chamak rahe hain

Aaj aasmaan mein taare aise chamak rahe hain…..

JAISE KAL CHAMAK RAHE THE !!! *wah wah wah *



–= Ruchit =–









Something Comedy for My Friends…





My dear friends,

Here there are something comedy shyris for u.



AAP AYE BAHAR AI,

AAP AYE BAHAR AI,

AAP AYE BAHAR AI,

VARNA ANDER HI THI;



AAP KO DEKH KE AISA LAGTA HAI,

AAP KO DEKH KE AISA LAGTA HAI,

KI GALATI TO BHAGVAN SE BHI HOTI HAI;



DOOR SE DEKHA TO SHER THA,

DOOR SE DEKHA TO SHER THA,

ISLIYE PAS HI NAHI GAYA;



KHUD KO KAR BULAND ITANA,

KI JA KE HIMALAYA KI CHOTI PE CHAD BETHE,

AUR KHUDA AKE TUJSE POOCHHE,

ABE GADHE, AB NICHE KAISE UTAREGA;



TERI JEEL SI NILI ANKHO ME KHO JANE KO DIL

KARTA HAI,

TERI JEEL SI NILI ANKHO ME KHO JANE KO DIL

KARTA HAI,

PAR KYA KARE YE KAMBAKHT CHASHMA JO

BICH ME ATA HAI;



GULAB GULAB KYA KARTE HO,

GULAB GULAB KYA KARTE HO,

MOGRA MOGRA KARO;



MAINE TUJE CHAHA THA SARASWATI SAMAJKAR,

MAINE TUJE CHAHA THA SARASWATI SAMAJKAR,

PAR TUNE MERE DIL KO BUJA DIYA AGARBATTI

SAMAJKAR.





























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